The Toys They are A-Changin’

I read three pieces of news this morning that made me happy, and they all intersected. One was Mattel’s announcement that they are releasing a new line of Barbies in multiple colors, shapes, and sizes. Also in toy news, LEGO has created a wheelchair-bound figure. And finally, there are the Girl Scouts, who turned down a $100,000 donation that stipulated the money could not be used to support transgender girls.

All of these stories have something in common: inclusion. They touch on children’s need to feel normal, and to see themselves reflected in their toys, in their clubs, and in their daily lives.

But what started as three nice stories about inclusion turned ugly when I looked at the comments, which ranged from racist, to sexist, to body shaming, to transphobic. It’s enough to make any sane person quit the Internet.

I returned to equanimity, though, when I reminded myself that these comments usually boil down to fear. Fear of the future. Fear of what we don’t understand. Fear of other people and how they might influence our lives or our children. There’s a lot of that going around the United States these days, as we spit and scrap over a nation we suspect is in decline, and a planet that is on the verge of spewing us out like it did the dinosaurs.

The extinction of the dinosaurs is a good metaphor for social change, too, because it’s going to happen whether anyone likes it or not. Change is the asteroid that has already crashed into the Earth; it’s not something you can deny or fend off. The generations below us have moved on, and they will demand their due. And if you’re someone whose world view can’t incorporate a transgender Girl Scout, a heftier Barbie, or a disabled Lego, it’s going to be a very bumpy ride.

Sadly, we don’t have the mindset, the temperament, the vocabulary, or the right platforms to discuss these issues in a way that will alleviate our fear. When we stopped agreeing that discourse should be respectful, that words shouldn’t be wielded like a weapon, that a back and forth brawl on Facebook isn’t helpful, we lost a significant part of what makes us human–the ability to communicate.

So instead, people are needlessly carrying that fear around–like a textbook-filled backpack from hell.

If we can’t heal ourselves with words, maybe we can try empathy instead. If you feel the need to make a fat joke about Barbie, or complain about LEGO being too PC, maybe stop and think about the children on the other end of those toys before you hit “Post.” Because what you casually dismiss might be the very thing that changes the way they dream. And what you see as a threat, they see as possibility.